When is a line really a line?

If you spend any time on online message boards then you have probably heard “a line is a line” and “the darkness of the lines on the test doesn’t matter.”  This is both true and false.  A line IS a line – if you have a 2nd line, then you are pregnant.  Even if it is the faintest line ever.  If it’s there (and you know its not an evaporation line) then you are pregnant.  A faint line doesn’t necessarily mean its a chemical pregnancy.  If you have caught the pregnancy shortly after it implanted, then your HCG levels are still low and the line will be faint.  What matters at that point, is that your HCG levels are doubling every 48-72 hours.  If they are doubling appropriately, then the lines on the HPT should start to get darker.  Yes, it can be subjective.  Yes, dye lots can differ some.  So don’t freak out if one test is lighter than the day before.  However, the general trend should be getting darker.  If you have tests that start light, get darker, and then start to get lighter again and eventually the line goes away, then that was a chemical pregnancy.

If you are going to obsess about lines (and I’m not necessarily advocating this, though I’ve been known to do it,) then you should make sure you have a bunch of the same test.  You can’t compare lines from different tests.  These Wondfo tests are perfect for line obsession because they are CHEAP and they are extremely sensitive.  As in, I got a positive result on one of these earlier this week when my HCG beta was merely 8.5.  That is as sensitive if not more than the FAR more expensive First Response Early Result.

All that said, I will fess up to peeing frequently this weekend as I wait for my next beta draw on Monday morning.  I want to see the lines get darker, but I keep expecting them to get lighter.  However, it seems that this pregnancy is sticking so far…as the lines have never lied to me.  Here are my lines from BFP through this afternoon.

I’m remaining cautiously optimistic.

I hate this roller coaster

Got my first beta back yesterday afternoon.  8.5.  I mean, really 8.5? Ugh…lowest beta I’ve ever seen.  I am trying to tell myself that since I got a negative the day before, that 8.5 isn’t so bad, that numbers have to start somewhere.  That 20 women on Betabase got a beta of 6-10 on 11DPO and saw a heartbeat.  But its very hard not to be discouraged.  I took another test today and the line looks about the same as yesterday…I think.  But I find myself staring and staring and sometimes it looks lighter and sometimes it looks darker and I realize I’m driving myself crazy again.  So annoying.  Its not like I forgot how long these days were, between betas, between tests, I didn’t, but since its been awhile, I kind of blocked it out.  Now I feel like I’m right back in it, though I will say, since I do have my 2 beautiful boys, the intensity is not ratcheted up nearly as high, and I’m thankful for that.  They keep me busy enough that I can forget for a time.

If this doesn’t work out (and I’m not feeling very positive right now), at least I know a solution that worked for me before and resulted in the birth of my second son.  All I have to do is call Dr. Bruce Lessey in Greenville, SC and he will prescribe this for me again and hopefully I won’t have to go through this again…and again…and again.